Thursday, 26 April 2012

The milkaholic, or 'mommy, you SUCK!'

17 April 2012

Despite evidence to the contrary, there actually IS someone on this planet whom I will allow to cough in my face. He's about 54 cm, 8-1/2 pounds, looks like a little cherub and is a raging milkaholic.

These milkaholic babies give pretty good hunger cues. Ours has three stages - 1) lick lips a bit while making piggy grunting sounds and kicking legs cheerfully; 2) suck on an imaginary bottle (which is about the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life); 3) full scale meltdown because the parent people have missed cues 1 and 2. The full out thermonuclear will also occur if the parent people stop feeding the little billy goat before he is officially full. I got this last night and my ears are still ringing. He seemed to be doubly pissed off because I rarely miss the early cues. It was like he was saying 'you KNOW I'm hungry! Why are you not LISTENING to me?!? You SUCK! I want my MOMMY! Oh damn, you ARE my mommy! But you're not LISTENING to me!!' Poor chicken. Poor Rukai too ;)

At any rate, as young son is exploding, I actually heard myself shouting to T - in reference to the formula - 'cool it down FASTER!!' as if he actually could do that. But our intrepid hero proved himself a genius by scooping Rukai out of my arms and getting under some dim lights. Then using the magic daddy touch and a load of rocking he cooled Rukai down instead. For so long in fact that he conked out and we had to warm the milk back up again.

I feel a bit like the Keystone Cops. Or the Harlem Globetrotters. Or the Three Stooges. Nyuk nyuk nyuk.

Milktender, another round please!!

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